LOW COST FUNERAL HOME..... OR STEAK DINNER. YOU DECIDE.

Yesterday I spoke with the director over at the State Board of Funeral Directors and Embalmers in regards to an issue that was brought to my attention. It seems that we were being refereed to as  a "Low Cost" funeral home.

"Low Cost" Hmmmmmmmm!

Well let's have a look at that phrase. You see, in today's economy, we tend to try and follow the trend. Right now it is my observation that many families can not afford steak every night for dinner. There for something simple like chicken and noodles or even sopa and arroz will suffice. I am not saying there is anything wrong with such a simple meal, but for some, this has become the "norm".

Now steak is a good meal, and I like steak, but again in today's economy it appears more and more that steak, as much as we like it in America is becoming a luxury. We, as a society, a vast majority of this society can no longer afford to eat steak three times a week. Times have changed, and society, to include businesses must understand that our spending habits and budgets have and will change with the times. Lets take into consideration Applebee's 2 for $20 dinners. They get it. Need I say more?

So, lets get back to that topic or that label of being a "Low Cost" funeral home. Now, there is a corporation that owns a chain of funeral homes in the valley that they pride themselves in referring to these locations as "Low Cost" facilities. This is the marketing tactic they feel they need to do to separate the haves and have-nots, the blue collar from the white collar or for a more understandable perspective, the rich from the poor.

There are also some independent funeral facilities in the valley that follow in the same footsteps as these corporate funeral giants doing the exact same thing, separating or trying to separate the classes.

Buy a car?

Again, back to the topic of "Low Cost" funeral home label. Well, I don't look at it like that, in comparison to my corporate competitors the next small town over. We here at Avenidas still are able to provide an elegant facility, larger selection and more personalization, more options than they can or will. All this at still a more affordable price not a lower cost or "Cheaper Price" ( did I not do a blog on this when we first opened?). If it is your desire to have more than they offer, THEY will be referred to the "White Collar" side of their funeral chains or the "haves" side of their business, or to keep it  simple, the richer side of the funeral chain.

Observe or listen to the words that fellow funeral establishments share with you either in print, in person or "on the PHONE" when you are shopping around.

Degrading or insulting comments are a facilities way of making a last ditch effort to get you to come into their facility or not to leave their facility. If this is all they can do by insinuating their competitors affordable charges equal substandard or immoral practices or service, then consider moving on. These are gimmicks of a shoddy used car salesman that is itching to get your cash in his or her pockets. Is this the type of facility or staff you want preparing your services?

Over the top advertising be it through busy sloppy adds that are almost overwhelming is a sign of corporate splatter (as I like to refer to it) or over convincing. Is it necessary? Should your facility, your name and reputation not speak for itself?

Once again back to the topic at hand, "Low Cost" funeral home. Instead of entertaining this phrase any longer, I feel very comfortable in accepting the label or referral as "Affordable Priced or "Comfortably Affordable".  At Avenidas Funeral Chapel I no longer feel that we have to nor have we ever had to prove our pricing, our staff or our services to anyone. We are good at what we do, we are proud of what we do and we are here to do what we do for you, in a comfortable, affordable and dignified location.

Remember, this is what they want you to believe.

Remember, if someone is referring to another location as "Low Cost" all they are doing is pointing the finger back at themselves and saying "Over Priced and over rated in their own eyes". OR! if they are corporate its all about "We have a quota to meet at all cost".

So check out that "Low Cost independent" facility as referred to by another local competitor, I think you will be amazingly surprised as to what you will find.

And again, I will stand on my comment that we have NEVER, EVER referred to any other location, be it by name, corporate name or street address to promote or belittle their services or staff, pricing or facilities. We do not, we will not.

BUCKET OF CHICKEN!

WOW! Delicious chicken...

Yesterday on my way home from work I decided to stop of at a local chicken joint and get a bucket of chicken.  It was a regular day and I decided to walk in instead of going through the drive thru to get my chicken. So I walked into this place and there were three people in the place behind the counter. A young lady, lets call her Diana, walked up to the counter and said “Hi! Welcome to Chicken Land” (fictitious name) can I help you?” Diane had the best demeanor that I have ever seen in a “chicken place”. I was really blown away by her friendly greeting and real sincere desire to help me select the right chicken to suite my needs and hunger.  I asked her, Diane, how long have you worked here? She said a while since she graduated from high school; she needed a job until she could decide what she was going to do. I was really blown away. Most places it takes all you have to ignore the fact that the kid behind the counter trousers are hanging below his…, well, you know.

Will that be a wing or a thigh?

I worked fast food during high school and I know what its like to have to deal with people and food.  It is really hard to deal with people on a daily basis who really don’t seem to care who you are, only that they are hungry and they want the chicken on the racks behind you and they have about 20 minutes to eat and get back to work.

I know Diane could not have made $7.50 an hour MAX and for that, she gave me a great smile, a pleasant greeting and was quick to retrieve my chicken.  As I left it almost didn’t seem fair that she did all that for me, put the cash in the company drawer and commenced to grab a towel to wipe down the tables out front. The sad part being, her boss back in chicken central in Kentucky does not know nor will they ever know or care who this person is on the front line in the chicken wars. They just want her to push the chicken.

So why am I doing all I can to bring Diana and the chicken fiasco to your attention? This is a simple person doing a very simple job as she goes through life serving people for such a small hourly wage. I’m sure that at the end of the week she gets her check and goes home and is happy to have served a few people some chicken and earn a little wage to enjoy her weekend, help out around the house or maybe care for her family. The point here is Diane did not appear to me to be very self deserving with her attitude in her job or position.

So many in this industry we call funeral appear to me to feel that way. I talked to a man as of this week who was trying to do a simple cremation for his sister. He shared with me that he called 13, that’s thirteen, funeral homes prior to our location before he felt comfortable enough to work with one. He was amazed at the charge for a direct cremation. He kept asking, and what else…, and what else….. Nothing I shared with him. Direct Cremation, $585 complete. All included.



YOU WANT WHAT?

I was told by this gentleman that he was disappointed with how insensitive the industry appears, once they make the pitch for the big sale and all you want is the direct cremation, it’s like the air is let out of the counselor’s sail. They just don’t appear to care. "They cant get me off the phone quick enough" he said. He asked me,  "Why do people not care or act like they are doing you a favor by talking to them? Why do they act as if you are asking them to throw a piece of trash away for them? That's my sister!" He said.

I shared with him that it is my belief and experience that: (I am not an expert now!)

• 1. MOST Corporate funeral staff work on commission for the service packages sold, a direct cremation does not draw that much commission for the arranger, if any at all.  Remember, anyone who has the opportunity to receive a commission on a sale will sell you ANYTHING for that commission. The more sold, the bigger the commission.  There is the incentive.
• 2. Smaller funeral homes don’t make that much on direct cremations so whether one is provided or not, there is no great loss of revenue. Some care, some don't. 
• 3. Corporate staff works by the hour, they are not serving from a family owned point of view, in other words, it’s just a job to them, not something they originally chose to do.
• 4. The employee just doesn’t care. Its an easy weekly check for them, either they help you or not, at the end of the day they just punch the clock and go home.

Bla Bla Bla, I have no time for this....

My 13 years of experience leads me to believe that a vast majority of poor service in the funeral industry falls under number 4. And they don't care. Most of these people should not be working in the death care industry. They took the job out of necessity and lack the passion and compassion to serve people during these trying times. Remember, when you find yourself talking to a person that is giving you the impression that you are annoying them, disturbing them or is spending more time talking or laughing with someone in the background or being put on hold, do yourself a favor and hang up, because they don't care, not for you, or the next caller.

There are a lot of good honest people out there that work in this industry because they really want to help people, both corporate and independent. Let me repeat that! There are a lot of good honest people out there that work in this industry because they really want to help people, both corporate and independent. Now the reason I repeat that is because I don’t want my post to be interpreted as one that is laying blame on all others and making myself the beacon of light in the funeral industry.

The funeral industry has its good and bad, like, uh, let’s see……. steel mills, churches, shoe stores, window cleaners, gardeners and yes even chicken land!

So the next time you find yourself in need, please call around, with a little luck and good reception from a caring individual, you just might run into a caring counselor who will greet you with a gentle smile, a caring heart, a gentle touch and does her job not for the bonus or the hourly wage, but because she wants to help you.

Even if your just buying a bucket of chicken.

VETERANS BENEFITS, WHAT YOU EARNED, NOT WHAT THEY GIVE YOU...

What You Get and What You Don't Get...

Veterans

All veterans are entitled to burial in a national cemetery, a grave marker (regardless of the cemetery), and a flag. Spouses and dependent children are also entitled to a lot and marker but only in a national cemetery. There will be no charges for opening or closing the grave, a vault or liner, or setting the marker in a national cemetery. Depending on the circumstances, a family will be responsible for all other expenses including transportation to the cemetery.

• Death during active duty. All funeral expenses will be paid by the military—body preparation, casket, transportation to the place of disposition, interment (if in a national cemetery), and marker. In addition, as of July, 2005, next-of-kin are entitled to a "death gratuity" of $100,000, retroactive to October 7, 2001.
• Death due to a service related injury. There is a $2,000 "burial allowance" for these veterans which may be used to cover some of the funeral director's expenses, the casket, and transportation to the cemetery. IF death occurred in a VA facility, transport of the body to the cemetery will be paid, provided it is no farther than the last place of residence. If burial is not in a national cemetery, there is a $300 "interment allowance," but it is unlikely that will cover opening and closing or vault charges, let alone the cost of the lot. Although a marker is available at no charge, the private cemetery will probably have a setting fee.
• Nonservice-related death in a VA facility OR while collecting a VA pension or disability compensation. There is a $300 "burial allowance" which may be used to defray some of the usual funeral expenses. Although burial in a national cemetery is free to these veterans, all other mortuary expenses are the responsibility of the family. Transportation to a national cemetery (not farther than the residence of the deceased) will be provided only if the death occurs in a VA facility. The $300 interment allowance applies when burial is in other than a national cemetery.

Death of a veteran outside a VA facility, not receiving military pension or compensation. The $2,000 and $300 benefits do not apply, nor is there reimbursement for transportation to the cemetery. The lot in a national cemetery, any required vault, interment, a marker, and flag are the only burial benefits. If interment is in other than a national cemetery, the family is responsible for the cost of the lot, opening and closing charges, the vault, and any fee charged for setting the government marker if that is selected. The family must also bear all other funeral costs.

Spouse and Dependents

• A spouse and dependents of an eligible veteran are entitled to burial in a national cemetery even if the veteran is not buried there.
  A spouse who remarries a nonveteran may claim burial rights from the prior marriage.
  Spouses receiving military pay and who die in a military medical facility are eligible for military transport to the nearest national cemetery or no farther than the last permanent residence.
  Adult children of veterans are entitled to burial benefits only if disabled and dependent.

Others Who May be Eligible

• There are a number of others eligible for veterans' burial benefits if the person has provided military-related service. The list is quite long and includes civilians who were involved with military efforts during war-time. Members of the National Guard and Reserves with 20 years of service are eligible. Some Public Health Service personnel are also eligible. You should inquire if you believe you might be entitled to such benefits.

Persons Not Eligible

• Divorced spouses
• Adult children
• Parents, siblings and others—even if they are dependents
• Those with a dishonorable discharge
• Those convicted of subversive activities and capital crimes

Markers

• Memorials are available to all veterans, spouses, and dependent children buried in a national cemetery and will be set without charge. For veterans who died before Sept. 11, 2001, markers are available to them —not to the spouse or dependents—for use in other cemeteries unless the grave has already been marked by a private memorial. For veterans who died on or after Sept. 11, 2001, the government will provide a headstone even if the grave already has a private marker. The installation cost must be borne by the family when in a non-government cemetery. Several styles of markers are available and must be consistent with existing monuments. Niche markers for cremains are also available.
  Inscription must include name, branch of service, year of birth, year of death—in this order—and may include emblem of belief, rank, and decorations earned. At private expense, additional items—such as nick-names and terms of endearment—may be added but must be approved by the VA.

Miscellaneous Benefits & Other Information

• You may not reserve space in a national cemetery ahead of time; arrangements are made only at the time of death. Therefore, there is no guarantee that spouses will be interred side-by- side.
• Burials in a national cemetery are not usually conducted on weekends.
• National cemeteries provide space for both body burial and cremated remains.
• Check with the cemetery regarding gravesite adornments other than natural cut flowers.
• Military honors or a funeral honor guard may be available from nearby military installations or veterans groups. Fly-overs are reserved for those on active duty at the time of death.
• A flag is provided on request for the burial of any veteran. Apply through the VA and pick up at a U.S. Post Office. Family members may wish to purchase a flag case for later display, available through private sources.
• Next-of-kin, other relatives or friends may request a "Presidential Memorial Certificate." More than one may be requested.
• A family may apply directly to the VA for all benefits. Although it may be convenient to let the undertaker do so, you may wish to ask if the mortician charges for submitting claims.
• When the body of a veteran without next-of-kin is unclaimed from a VA facility and the estate is without sufficient assets, the VA will assume responsibility for burial.
• Other than for sea burial, there are NO casket requirements for routine body burial. An undertaker handling the unclaimed body of a vet must supply something more durable than cardboard, unless the body is to be cremated.
• "No-fee" passports are available for family visiting overseas grave-sites or memorials.
• The National Cemetery System may be asked to do a search to locate anyone interred in a national cemetery. In addition to general vital statistics, you will need to know the state from which the veteran entered military service.
• There are STATE-run veterans cemeteries that may offer the same or similar benefits, with some restrictions. For a listing of VA cemeteries, check http://cem.va.gov/

Caution!

 

Lets unlock this mess

The VA has gotten numerous complaints from vets who were approached by large CORPORATE commercial cemetery and funeral outfits offering free cemetery lots or other so-called veterans benefits for a minimal fee. These offers are made thru various veterans organizations thru free breakfast or lunch seminars to supposedly explain their "Free Cemetery Benefits" that they offer. Please understand that cemetery benefits offered by these organizations are already offered by the veterans administration at no charge to you or your family. It is the hope of these CORPORATE agencies that you are unaware of your already free and earned cemetery benefits and that you will not question the legitimacy of their credentials or assumed representation of any government agency. This can be confusing and misleading for some elderly veterans. Please be cautious.

They DO NOT represent the U.S. government or the VETERANS ADMINISTRATION! 

Please ensure that you are not being manipulated into purchasing items and privileges that you are already entitled to at no charge to you.

Be sure to ask:

• Must you also purchase another lot at the same time to get anything free?
• Can my spouse be buried with me at your cemetery for free?
• Can I be buried with my spouse at your cemetery for free?
• Can my spouse and I be buried together at a National cemetery? (this should be yes)
• Is the cemetery or any part there of maintained by the federal government?
• Where is it located?
• How much will it cost?
• Is it a national cemetery?(We have a National Cemetery Section) wrong answer
• Can I get the same at a National cemetery for free? (this should be yes)
• Is "perpetual care" additional?
• What are the costs for opening and closing each grave?
• Must certain memorials be purchased through the cemetery?
• Am I entitled to a free memorial marker from the federal government? (this should be yes)
• Can it be placed at your cemetery? (this should be yes)
• What are the costs for setting memorial markers?
• Is a vault required? Even for cremated remains? May it be purchased elsewhere?
• Are there marker or planting restrictions?
• What are the "administrative" charges?
• Who owns the cemetery? Is it a Corporation?
• Is there a nearby Veterans cemetery which charge nothing to me for the same services? (this should be yes)
• Do you, your CORPORATION or any of your agents represent the federal government in any way at all?
• May I have a business cards and name to present to the local Veterans administration for verification?

Understand your benefits and what you have earned, do not be scammed into purchasing something that is already yours. If you are the child of an elderly veteran, please accompany them to these so called "free seminars" to assist them in understanding their true benefits and legal rights. Never sign anything without first presenting it to the local veterans administration offices for verification. If you feel pressured, walk away...

Burial At Sea

Burial At Sea Burial (or the scattering of cremains) at sea is available to all veterans and dependents, and is provided by the Navy or US Coast Guard. A flag is required, and—if supplied by the family—can be returned. If supplied by the Navy, it will not be.

Because sea burials are done at the convenience of the military, the family may not witness sea burial.

Bodies waiting for sea burial must be embalmed to a state of preservation that will last for at least 60 days. (This is accomplished with undiluted embalming fluid; "stiff.")

A nonsealing metal casket must be used, bound with six bands of nylon. The casket must carry 150 lbs. of extra weight.

Two-inch holes (20 total) must be drilled in the top, bottom, and at each end.

To reach the regional Veterans office in your area, call 800-827-1000.

Semper Fi

WHAT IS FAMILY OWNED AND OPERATED WORTH TO YOU?

Three or four times a week on my way to work I fumble with my cell phone to call my mother to see how she’s doing, sometimes I ask, “Mom, will you be coming into work today to clean today?” She asks if she is needed, of course she is, my mom is always needed. Other times she will call me and say, “Mijo, do you need me to help with a service tonight?" She likes to come in and help pass out prayer cards during the visitation or do whatever she can to help. It is important that she not stay late because not only do I not like her driving at night but I want her to be home.

This is family owned and operated, this is the definition of it, it is being involved with the business and as a family helping out where you can. I call on all my family now and again when needed. From assisting with moving things to my brother-in-law who plays with a Mariachi. And they come to help. To share the responsibility and guide a family. To help, not the funeral home, but the family, both their own and the one that has suffered the loss.

Avenidas Funeral Chapel would not be what it is today if it was not for my mother pushing me and telling me, “Son, you know what you are good at, people have always searched you out for your guidance during these times. So why don’t you move forward with this?” With my mother's influence and family assistance, I did.

Family owned and operated is much more than just a title, it is much more than just a flag to wave in front of someones face, or a banner to post on a building. It is a responsibility to the family you serve. They come to you expecting a little bit more. A softer touch, some understanding and perhaps the last thing they want to hear about is whether the company will allow you to do or not do something. They came to sit with "you" so “you” can give them advice, “you” can explain the system and “you” can give them a little compassion and understanding ensuring that they are requesting an adequate service that is within their budget. The family that comes to you is hoping to build a personal relationship with you and your family. Some families need a little financial help more than others, yes, some come hoping "you" are the one that can show that compassion, not the guy down the hall. They don't want to meet the manager, the president, or the CEO. All they want is a little bit of help.

It does not matter what the price range of the services you select or the facility you choose. In my humble opinion, to use a family owned and operated funeral home is by far better than those that are not family owned. With family owned and operated, a vast majority of the time you can count on meeting the business owner from the time he or she takes the call in the wee hours of the morning, when he or she goes to the hospital or your residence to bring the deceased into their care, and he or she stands at your side at the grave. That is the quality of service most family owned funeral homes will provide.

Remember, there are those that slip through the cracks. Some independents have gone by the wayside and can’t take their eye off the bottom dollar when working with a family. Use your best judgment. If a facility gives you a good feeling when you walk in, consider it for your services, if it is cold and sterile, use caution. If you so choose to use anything other than family owned, insist on working with the same representative, pick the one that makes you feel most comfortable.

With family owned and operated, it should not be difficult to change simple things or request little things such as a phone call or a correction on a document. When a record is being kept of all calls, faxes and documents, or you hear terms like "Forms A, C, ACC, D, E", use caution. Ask to see the deceased’s case folder.

There are allot of very good individuals that work in the “other than” family owned funeral homes. You will see them shine if you are in a position to be able to use them. It is really unfortunate, what happens to really good employees, that put a lot of care into their work, in these non family owned funeral homes.

Personalization is a very big part of what "family owned and operated" is all about. Personalization, to me, is defined as, no two services are the same, no two contain a cookie cuter approach to what it is. We strive to treat every family as different, as they truly are to the one before and the one that will follow. My family and I put a lot into what we do every time we help a family. It is very comforting to me when I am told by a family, “It’s like your one of us”. Well I am, and I am proud of the service that I provide to those out there that are just like me.

LET'S TALK ABOUT CREMATION..AGAIN..IT'S ALWAYS WORTH REPEATING

Cremation is one of the most basic ways for the “final disposition” of a set of human remains.  Of all services offered in the funeral industry, cremation is perhaps the most affordable in the industry, with “Direct Cremation” being the absolute most affordable to a family’s out of pocket expenses.

I have sat with many families who called and shared that all they wanted was “Cremation”, nothing more.  I respond with our cremation price of $585. Usually the family is a bit surprised because that is a very affordable price for an all inclusive, direct cremation.

Now, there is no such thing as “the right price” for a direct cremation.  To be honest, the right price  is the price that you find acceptable and choose to pay. I have seen the cremation price in this industry vary from $550 up to $3,500, all for pretty much the same thing. The price that you pay is usually all inclusive. The direct cremation “traditionally” provided by a funeral home consists of:

• Proportional share of the overhead cost
• Removal of the deceased from the place of death
• Refrigeration (will reflect a specific amount of days)
• Filing of the death certificate
• Cremation or disposition permit
• Cremation container (large cardboard box)
• Transport to the crematory
• Cremation process
• Temporary container for cremains back to family (not an urn)

Again, different funeral homes charge different prices, some locations are nicer than others, but do the exact same thing. The price paid depends on what the family chooses to pay, for they have the option of going elsewhere if it appears too pricey.

So what about cremation societies? Well, they're a good idea and there is nothing wrong with them at all, but if you are looking for the most affordable, look again. Most cremation societies will be underpriced by local "Mom and Pop" funeral homes. As a matter of fact, pretty much all of your local "Mom and Pop" funeral homes will have the most affordable price. If you need to confirm this, please shop around until you find the most affordable.

What about traditional services ending with cremation? Is this an option?

Absolutely! Burial is becoming more and more uncommon and many families are unaware that services can conclude with cremation instead of going to burial. You, as the consumer have the option of visitation (viewing), church services, or both, that conclude with cremation. The price tends to be more affordable due to the "no need" of a casket purchase. The local funeral home can sell you a "cremation casket" or rent you a cremation casket shell with a new insert and arrange for all the services you may decide to have.

Do I have to buy an urn?

No, you do not, but most funeral homes have a vast selection of urns to choose from. Urns, like caskets can be marked up a great deal so choose wisely. If it is your intent to scatter at a later date, an urn is not recommended, or perhaps a biodegradable scattering urn. Any reputable funeral home will provide you with a sufficient container to take the cremains home, if you can not afford an urn. A family can also provide their own container to be used as an urn if they like or purchase one elswere.

Can I bury cremains?

 

Cremation urn with inground vault



Yes, you can. You can also put a marker on the spot for future visits or even select something in a mausoleum or columbarium for future visits. Remember that a burial spot for cremains are usually far more affordable than for a full body burial plot. You can also purchase an underground urn vault if you like.

What about veterans cremains, can they be placed in a national cemetery?

Yes, as long as the veteran was separated under honorable conditions. All veterans, be them cremated or full body burial are generally eligible for internment in a VA cemetery. Contact the Veterans Administration or any local funeral home for assistance.

Is it legal to scatter the cremains at sea or on land?

Yes it is, as long as you are mindful of other people’s private property or locations. Contact your state funeral board representatives for further instructions and guidance in this area.

Can I take the Cremains home with me?

Yes, many families choose to do this until they decide what to do at a later date.

What about body donation and cremation?

Anotomical donation is a service presented by many funeral establishments. Basically what it is, is if a family chooses, they may donate the body to science or to an anotomical facility. Some of these facilities are non-proffit, some are for profit, some return some of the cremains to the family and some do not. In return, After a very thorough screening process and if the remains or body is accepted by the facility, the accepting facility will pay for the cremation of the remains that were not harvested from the deceased. There is nothing wrong with these facilities, just be very aware of what you are signing and have a very good understanding of what will become of the remainder of the body that does not get used. Will they be returned to you or will they be buried in a common grave? Many questions exist in this new area of human remains disposition. Many people can benifit from the donation of harvested body parts both for science and future quality of life.  Please consider but also be informed.

To conclude, remember, all funeral homes charge different prices for cremation. Some cost more than others and many people feel comforted in paying a little more. That is ok, if you can afford the charge and are comfortable with it, then it is your right to do so. Just remember that there are those out there that can’t afford as much, and they need locations and services that can accommodate their budget as well.

YOU GET WHAT YOU PAY FOR.......

First things, please pardon my spelling, now that it is out of the way.....





Sugarland Mortuary

I have a very good friend of mine, I consider him a good friend for as well I am very close to his mother. I started in the funeral industry under their supervision at "Williams San Diego Memorial Chapel" I refer to Miss Williams as Miss Sheila or "Mother" I am grateful for the introduction and opportunity they gave me by allowing me to serve under their business and teach me the ways. As much as I learned from Miss Williams, I learned just as much from her Son who is the Owner of "Sugarland Mortuary" in Sugarland, Texas. I learned a great deal from Mr. Williams. At a young age of 29, he taught me not so much as how to work in the funeral industry, but how to be a humble servant and man in such a grandiose environment that he has created for himself  to serve the people. Mr. Williams has a immaculate palatial funeral home. Let there be no bones about it that every and anyone that comes to him for his services has a true understanding that "You get what you pay for". Mr. Williams had his facility built from the ground up with funds he worked night and day, very very hard in the two facilities he established in Oakland California prior to his return to Sugarland Texas.

 

Sugarland Chapel

 At Sugarland, you pay. But it is with the understanding that this is what you asked for. He is not one that is trying to sell you something that is not, nor is his facilities and services less than the appearance of his business. He is very exclusive and elaborate. Some may say "over the top" I do not because those that choose to frequent his facility for "end of life" arrangements are well to understand that his pricing reflects the amount of capitol and effort he has put into his business.  I remember when I worked for his Mother that there was no secret that this was his life's dream. And as much as he is fulfilling his dream, he has NEVER put himself above his Mother, who owns San Diego Memorial Chapel, or myself, knowing that I can still turn to him for advice if need be, and I do, I feel very comfortable doing this. What a good, good man he is. As much as he has grown at such a young age he never, ever felt that himself, his staff, his business nor his environment grew to big for anyone including a little guy like me trying to help people. He has told me on more than one occasion, "Miguel, just help people, it will come back to you" He said it is those in the industry that get to large for their pants and forget that they too started small will be doomed to failure, It is those that choose to grow or reach the top on the backs of others that are doomed to fall, maybe not fail, but fall"



Reception Hall



I remember when Mr. Williams would come down from Oakland CA. to San Diego how he would tell his Mom about his dream. It is exactly how he said it would be. And as big and grandiose as it is, he always has time to take my call. What a great guy, there are so many that could learn so much from him in this industry. They have so much to share and offer if perhaps they were a bit more humble. But unfortunately there are but a few "Mr. Williams" in this industry.

I was told in a conversation with a person that I had no idea the type of background or environment they came from when introduced to this industry. Well, my point being here is "Never make assumptions about anyone else's training or experience. Some of us choose to be where we are and do what we do because that is what we CHOSE TO DO!

You see, its not about the cost, the charge, or the price. Its not about the Bronze casket or the Mahogany casket or the Stainless Steel casket. Its not about the Motor Escorts or the Marble Vault or the $600 in roses arrangement. It is about what you pay for, and at a facility such as this, this grand Funeral Parlor of impeccable taste and style, I would expect you to pay $7,000 for a funeral service and you WOULD GET $7,000 worth of funeral service. I have yet to find ANY location near my business that comes close to this facility, it's style or its service.

Lets review, should you choose to pay that much for funeral services, ensure that you are receiving service that goes above and beyond THESE expectations, nothing less. If your working with a funeral home that cant offer you services and facilities as good as these and your pricing is above $7,000. Perhaps you should negotiate or search for a place that is willing to negotiate. I am not saying that you need to disqualify the standards of the location you are at, but perhaps they need a little bit of a rude awakening that their standards are maybe a little lower than they assume. Compared to Sugarland that is.



Mr. Williams once told me, "Miguel, almost every funeral home owner wants to get to the finish line, but none of them appear to want to run the race" Well, I'm finding this to be the truth, some cut across the lawn, some never even leave the gate and just wait for the first lap to come around and some never even show up. Don't be one of those. I told him I wont, besides, His Mom would beat the crap out of me!!!

My friend is very proud of his facility, rightfully so. It is not the type of facility I would own or operate. It is not me. He understands that. This is not the client base I want to serve. He is very secure with that as well. He has no insecurities with the other little mom and pop funeral homes in the area. He is not out to "Shut them down". He is a good man, and as long as she is living I will always refer to his Mom as "Mother". For she did right by raising her son to be such a successful and humbled servant. What a good man, a great man that does good things to help people, not for recognition or to "fluff" his ego, but because it is the right thing to do...

Oh, by the way, Donell told me I could use the pictures  from his website, were tight like that..... We go back a few years.

ARE FUNERAL HOMES COMPETITIVE?

Well, that is quite a topic. First things first, everyones pricing is "affordable" to someone...









Recent funeral convention...

I was privileged enough to sit with another local business owner this week and get a better understanding of another persons perspective and how ones upbringing through society and their life reflects on their business goals.

I learned and understand that some people have bigger goals than me. That is OK, I see no problem with that at all, if we were, as a society restricted in our ability to have big goals we would be just like the Soviet Union, and were are they today?

The topic came up with this gentleman about what we wanted out of our business. He shared with me a great dream, a desire to do a great deal with what he has, I could see it in his eyes. He really has a great, great passion to move forward with his dream. This my friends, is America, there is nothing at all wrong with that. I listened to his very detailed vision with great respect and understanding. It made me smile because privately I knew that I was part of that, for without spirited rivalry, ones path is to easy. He finishes his talk and then it was my turn.

I (me, Miguel Legaspi) also have a dream, as I shared it with him, I will share it with you.

My business and focus of everything I do in my life, is to help people. I like doing that, and that is not wrong. If I can only help people a little bit with what little bit I have, I will help were I can. But, I also know that I have to run a business, and it does me no good to "give the farm away" because then I would not be able to help anymore.

I say allot of things on these blogs that allot of people will find very offensive and interpret as a personal attack against themselves and their business. They are not.  

I have a real real big problem with the very scandalous and corrupt side of the industry. It is very bad, but my blogs are not a personal observation of the industry as a whole. 

This was the first time myself and this fellow business owner have ever spoken, it was a little tense, a little shuffling from left to right, but after a few cups of coffee I noticed a few smiles moving in and it came out well. 

You see, no matter how much people think it is within them to drive others out of business, I don't see that, It was not my intent to open Avenidas Funeral Chapel to hurt or think I had any type of clout to push anyone out. You would be surprised how many other facilities think that they have it in them to "Shut another" down. That's silly. 

Funeral homes are like Auto Dealers, Some people go buy Cadillacs because they like them and can afford them, But now and again you find someone trying to buy one that cant afford one. Other people will buy a simple ford or Chevy or even a Hyundai because that is all they can afford. There is no shame in that. Like a funeral, it accomplishes its purpose. BUT there is nothing wrong at all either with someone who wants to buy a Cadillac.

My business associate told me a very wise thing, It stuck in my head and He was right. He said that he felt that  "people should die like they lived". I agree with him 100%. Unfortunately, allot of people don't. But you know what? That is their choice! Some go direct cremation when they can afford a mahogany casket with all bells and whistles ant then there all those that prefer it all when they really have no funding to do anything.  Then there are those that can aford all that and so much more and all they want is to be cremated and put in a coffee can, go figure.

So, are funeral homes competitive you ask?

Get away from him I'm doing this funeral

It depends on the owner, I don't think I am, where we are located there are 3 other funeral homes in a 12 mile radius. I do not compete with them because I can not be them, I can only do the best that I can do to help others bury their dead. That is what I want to do, believe it or not, no matter how harsh some of my blogs are, I have no ill will towards anyone.

But on the other hand, I will not sit back and allow subtle back door attacks that are camouflaged in the name of "business" to be thrown at my business out of ones false inflated concerns of my existence. That is ones attempt to drive one out of business without getting to know them and that's just plain mean spirited, no matter what the business is. If pushed, as any man would, I tend to push back a little harder. If it is discomforting, then don't push.

I opened my business on a fair playing field and all I ask is a fair chance to run my business so I can provide good business without having to worry about my suppliers or service providers being forced to serve one client over the other out of fear of me being competitive, I am not, I just happen to be in the same business! Remember, I don't sell Cadillacs.

Did you know there are funeral homes in the valley that do everything they can to get every single service there is in the valley every day? First off, that's crazy, were would you put all the bodies and you couldn't do all the paper work. That is just greed as well, there is enough business to go around. I have a very open door policy. I serve everyone but it is no secret that a vast majority of my client base is Hispanic, Why? My Name? My Location? It probably is a variety of different things. there are funeral homes out there that feel threatened by that. Why? I don't know, again, because they want it all.

Many have asked why I am so negative about the industry I work in. As said to me, It appears that I was introduced to a very negative and immoral, unethical side of the industry through "most" of the employers Ive worked for, You know what? The person that told me that was right, and I am only trying trying to do what I can to help you stay out of those types of locations.

I don't want it all, I don't want to compete, I don't want to get rich, I don't want a new car......

I just want to help people, that's all. 

Oh, the way I choose to help people is through my affordable pricing, There is nothing wrong with that. I can charge what I please as can any business owner, and I fully support their decision to price their merchandise and services as they see fit. It does not make them wrong at all. And it does not make me right, or wrong. It is just my price, thats all.

IS CREMATION CHEAPER THAN BURIAL?

 Yes!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why? well, were do I start. Your talking about two totally different directions that you take after a death to reach a final disposition. That being the end of the handling of remains and conclusion of all religious services or rights of passage.

Lets look at Burial.

• Pick up the body
• meet with the family
• select a casket
• family meet with the cemetery
• do the paperwork
• call the church
• order all the stuff
• make the book and folders
• prepare the body
• order the flowers
• hold the visitation
• hold the service
• load the hearse
• hold the procession
• unload the hearse
• burial

 

Burial is a ritual that is full of tradition and religious value to some. In the beginning it was a simple way of disposing of a set of human remains at a specific location or just about anywhere to prevent the foul odor of the decaying body from being offensive to others. It also afforded friends and family the opportunity to go and reflect and remember the deceased. Now, is this documented as the real reason? probably not. But if you stop and think about it, it is the most logical.

I often find myself helping people who are doing everything they can to save a few dollars. I find myself telling them allot of times, "well, you can do that yourself".  There is so much in this industry you can do yourself. But there is also allot you really should not try to. The typical funeral home does not want you to do anything at all by yourself. They want to do it all, and charge you for all of it.  If you can do it yourself to save a few dollars, I will tell a family if asked.

Burial is one of those areas that has allot involved in it. I don't think in the beginning when the first person ever died and they had the first funeral ever that everyone expected it to be so complex. With complexity comes charges, we all know that.  There was a time when families tried to do services outside of the funeral home by going to the church for visitation. Then the church found it to be a great idea to not only charge for the facility, but also the priest use and the musician, the graveside service and the rosary if you have one. This on top of all that the funeral home charges. The excuse is, "we don't know why the funeral home charges, we do the services". at the same time because of all this the funeral home sees itself losing cash because no one is using their facilities so they charge a "Fee" to take the deceased to the church and have their guys stand around till the church is done. Never mind the fact that this charge is the same amount as the use of the chapel. You cant get around it.

SERVICES
 

Other things to include, Visitation, church service, Graveside service (that's an interesting one, you get charged as much as a church service so the funeral director can hold a bucket of dirt while everyone files by to toss it on the grave, then thanks you for being there on behalf of the family and bla bla bla...) Don't get me wrong, this is all tastefully done and with great elegance, but do you really want to pay $350 so a guy can hold a bucket while everyone scoops dirt out of it?

HEARSE

And the hearse, lets not forget about the last ride. The hearse is traditionally the traditional way to go, BUT! did you know you can use your own vehicle? You can, no law says you have to use a hearse.

EMBALMING
 

Body preparation is important, cost money to embalm and dress and casket. BUT! Did you know you can dress the deceased if you want to? also do the hair and make up. But then again the funeral home may charge you to use their facility to do this, well, what to do, take the deceased home to dress them their? It's a catch 22. Oh, remember, Embalming is not required by law, nope! not at all.

PAPER WORK
 

Now administratively, to be honest, I spend more time sitting and connecting with a family, making the arrangements than I do "arranging" everything. 20 to 35 minutes maximum. That's it! nothing else really. The computer age puts everything, from personalization to obituaries at my fingertips. Death certificate filing, all via computer. No Doctor chasing, as some of my fellow funeral business owners would want you to believe.

CASKET
 

Oh, and the casket, no matter what, you will pay for a burial casket if you choose burial. Even if you buy it elsewhere. Oh, and don't be fooled, just about ALL caskets are made up of parts manufactured in another country. That is the God honest truth, they may be assembled in America, but it is of parts manufactured in another country such as Mexico, China or Vietnam.

CEMETERY

Grave purchase......... WOW! that can cost as much as the funeral service itself. $4,000 to $8,000 for the ground, opening and closing and a grave box. (Cement box the casket goes in)

So your looking at about all together, the minimum of about $7,000 to $10,000 total. Give or take a thousand.

Lets look at cremation now!

Remember that initial paragraph about burial because of the foul odor and reflection? Well guess what? some see that the cremation a body does the same thing, removes the odor and they are not so compelled to have to go somewhere to reflect. They consider burial as a waste of space and all the service part of it all can either be morbid and ghoulish. These individuals have a different outlook on the afterlife, the processing of grief and the whole death process. This does not make them wrong, nor does it make those that think cremation as being wrong..., wrong.

Cremation is pretty basic if its just direct cremation.

• pick up the body
• meet with the family
• do the paperwork
• cremate the body
• return the ashes to the family

Basic cremation is very simple, it is not expensive nor does it have the cost of the cemetery. Some family members prefer to purchase an urn. They can do that. Some choose to take in a container provided.

Oh, one of the newest things by the funeral home is to give you the cremains in a cardboard box, this is to make you feel cheap and guilty. and make you want to buy an urn.

For the same amount of money, they can have the crematory put the ashes in a black plastic container. you know, Like we do at Avenidas, no extra charge.

Basic cremation is a very simple dignified end to ones existence. It is for those that wish to honor ones simple wish and choose not to go through all the fan fair of a very elaborate service. There is absolutely nothing at all wrong with a simple direct cremation. If this is what you choose or what you are doing to honor the wishes of a friend or loved one, do not allow yourself to be talked out of it by someone playing or tugging on your heartstrings wishing you would spend more money at their facility. Keep it basic........

CREMATION WITH FUNERAL SERVICES
 

Now, you can do some things that introduce certain parts of the "Burial" traditions into the cremation services requested, a visitation, a church service with the body present and so on. Remember this will increase the price of the services but in the end, you will be concluding with cremation so you are avoiding the price of the casket purchase and the burial plot. (the two biggest price items in a burial service)

RELIGEON

Ok, so what about religion? I'm Catholic, what do they allow me to do? Well, that's a whole other topic, but guess what, you can cremate, read the BLOG I wrote to further understand the Catholic faiths guidelines on cremation and the human body.

Click here;  The Roman Catholic Church and Cremation
 

THATS IT!

So there you go, pretty much give you a simple breakdown of cremation versus burial.

Oh, so what is the difference in cost from direct cremation to burial?

about $7,000, give or take a thousand.....

For more information on cremation, follow the blue link and read : "Lets Talk About Cremation.... AGAIN!"

 

I was asked about how much cremation is in the local area. Well, for the local consumer it can be as high as $2,300 at any corporate funeral provider (Dingity), or as low as $495 at our facility here in Avondale. The range varies within those prices.

Shop around.

Miguel